the own it podcast

38. TRAUMA: What is it + How do I know if I have it?

In today’s episode, I want to dive into a topic that’s become a big part of the self-help and mental health world—trauma. There’s a lot of information out there, but let me start by saying that this is just a small lens into the trauma space. It’s not the full picture, but I hope it offers you clarity and encouragement. As a certified trauma practitioner, I’ve encountered so many women who’ve come to me carrying “trauma.” Trauma changes us—our brains, bodies, emotions, and even choices. But it’s important to understand what trauma is—and isn’t.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

• Defining trauma: What it is and what it’s not.
• The cultural misuse of trauma language and its impact.
• How trauma affects the brain, body, and emotions.
• The difference between sensory and narrative memories and their role in trauma.
• Understanding symptoms of trauma: hypervigilance, emotional dysregulation, and self-protective behaviors.
• Why trauma is more about the brain’s encoding of an event than the event itself.
• How connection and processing in real-time can mitigate trauma.
• The role of integration and desensitization in healing trauma memories.

If you’ve experienced trauma, I see you and there is hope and healing for you. You are not alone and I pray that God will supply all of your needs according to His glorious riches – every body, soul, and spirit need that you have!

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

If you’re interested in joining Thrive, the doors CLOSE TODAY (Friday, February 7) so you can join by heading to www.comealivelifecoaching.com/thrive. Use the code THRIVETODAY and get your first month completely free!

BONUS: Why You Keep Repeating the Same Patterns + How to STOP

Ever feel like you’re stuck in survival mode, reacting instead of responding, repeating the same frustrating patterns? You want to be patient with your husband, kids, or friends—but then, boom, you’re triggered, and it’s over. Pain blocks our access to the life we were created for—the love, joy, peace, and freedom that are rightfully ours.

This semester, inside Thrive, we’re diving deep into inner healing—not just talking about it but actually doing the work to heal emotional, mental, and spiritual wounds. We’re breaking unhealthy cycles, healing past pain, building secure attachment, and learning how to live fully in our bodies again. Because the enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but we are reclaiming what belongs to us.

In this episode, we unpack:

✨ What inner healing is (and why it matters)

✨ What we’re actually healing from—childhood wounds, trauma, limiting beliefs, and relational pain

✨ How unhealed wounds show up in our lives—from anxiety and perfectionism to trust issues and spiritual disconnect

✨ The pathway forward—because healing isn’t just possible, it’s what we were made for

If you’re tired of just getting by and ready to truly thrive, this one’s for you. Let’s do the work together.

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

If you’re interested in joining Thrive, the doors are OPEN so you can join by heading to www.comealivelifecoaching.com/thrive. Use the code THRIVETODAY and get your first month completely free!

37. The 5 Soul Wounds Keeping You Stuck (and How to Heal Them!)

In this episode, I take a deep dive into the core wounds of the soul and how they impact our everyday lives. The soul—our mind, will, and emotions—is deeply influenced by our past experiences, shaping how we think, feel, and act. When these experiences leave us with unresolved pain, they create soul wounds that can keep us stuck, repeating patterns we don’t understand.

But here’s the good news: soul wounds can be healed! Healing these wounds restores wholeness and helps us show up as our authentic selves. It’s not about slapping on a bandaid—it’s about doing the deeper work to release pain, break cycles, and find freedom.

We cover the 5 core soul wounds—Safety, Trust, Belonging, Worthiness, and Availability—and how they show up in our thoughts, emotions, and actions. And most importantly, I share five practical steps to heal these wounds so you can live from a place of wholeness, not pain.

This episode will leave you feeling encouraged, empowered, and ready to take the next step in your healing journey!

5 Steps to Heal a Soul Wound

1. Identify and name the wound. Awareness is the first step to freedom.
2. Sit with the wound. Reflect on how it’s shaped your life and where the pain still shows up.
3. Grieve the loss. Allow yourself to feel the unmet needs and let go of what was.
4. Invite God to heal. Forgive, release, and ask for divine restoration.
5. Create new experiences. Begin building healthy connections and habits that reinforce healing.

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

THRIVE DOORS ARE OPEN!! If you’re interested in joining Thrive, head to www.comealivelifecoaching.com/thrive. Use the code THRIVETODAY and get your first month completely free!

36. Grieving in Transition w/Colby Ellis

In this inspiring episode, we sit down with Colby Ellis, a wife, mom of two, and corporate professional working from home. Colby shares her deeply personal journey of navigating a massive life transition: moving across the country with her family. In a candid conversation, she opens up about how she managed the emotional challenges of such a significant change, how she allowed herself to grieve, and the importance of showing up for her family, even when it felt overwhelming. Colby also discusses the role that the Thrive program played in her season of transition, offering insights into how she learned to give herself grace, balance self-care, and build the practical tools to thrive amid uncertainty.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

• Colby shares her journey of moving across the country with her family while balancing her corporate job, marriage, and two children.
• She opens up about the importance of allowing yourself to grieve during major life changes, but also how to lean into the Lord who gives grave in every season to show up to your life.
• Colby discusses how Thrive helped her develop practical tools for coping with change and how the community of women were a Godsend in a hard season of instability.
• She emphasizes learning to give herself grace, especially in moments of overwhelm, and the importance of showing up for her family while taking care of her own emotional well-being.
• We talk about how to trust the Lord in seasons of change and transition, even when things don't go the way you think they will. 

This episode offers an incredibly relatable and insightful conversation for anyone going through a season of transition. Whether you're moving, changing jobs, or navigating a new chapter in life, Colby’s story shows that it’s okay to grieve, it’s okay to not have everything figured out, and it’s possible to THRIVE!

HOW TO CONECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

If you’re interested in joining Thrive, the doors are OPEN so you can join by heading to www.comealivelifecoaching.com/thrive. Use the code THRIVETODAY and get your first month completely free!

35. From Rock Bottom to Thriving: a Journey of Transformation w/Sneha Joseph

In today’s episode, we hear from a current Thrive member, Sneha, who shares her powerful personal story of moving from survival mode to thriving in her life. In 2020, Sneha's world completely fell apart. She found herself in a place where she could hardly function, overwhelmed by stress and uncertainty and every single day was a battle just to get through. One of Sneha’s turning points came when she joined Thrive Collective. This community of like-minded-like-hearted women gave her the tools, resources, and support she needed to rebuild her life after trauma.

 

This is a powerful episode full of spiritual and practical application. Sneha's story is inspiring and encouraging, full of hope and transformation. You won't want to miss listening to this one!

 

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

If you’re interested in joining Thrive, the doors are OPEN so you can join by heading to www.comealivelifecoaching.com/thrive. Use the code THRIVETODAY and get your first month completely free!

34. A Window Into My Heart: How to Grieve an Old Season

This week, I’m sharing a personal, process-oriented episode instead of my typical teaching-based episodes. I don’t have all the answers, but I do know this is an essential part of living an abundant life: grieving and letting go of old seasons

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS

Life in God is full of seasons, and each season shapes who we are becoming. But with new seasons come new assignments and the vulnerability of stepping into the unknown.Sometimes we resist letting go of an old season because it’s familiar and comfortable. Other times, we’re so eager to move forward that we forget to grieve what we’re leaving behind. Either way, it’s critical to grieve well so we can fully embrace what’s ahead.

In this episode, I share chunks of my story and how I’ve learned how to move through different seasons in God to where I’m constantly moving from glory to glory and towards what He’s called me to do. 

I dive into several key ways to transition from one season into the next:

1. Honor the Past: Grieving a past season honors its significance. Let yourself process deeply, talk with trusted people, and seek counseling if needed.
2. Set Memorial Stones: Create ways to remember God’s faithfulness in past seasons. I keep memory boxes for my kids, holding keepsakes that remind me of how God showed up for us.
3. Let Go of What No Longer Serves You: Old mindsets—fear, insecurity, or people-pleasing—can’t go with you into a new season. Identify and release these with God’s help.
4. Get Vision for What’s Ahead: Vision gives purpose and direction. Without it, we live aimlessly. Take time to seek God for clarity about where He’s leading you.

Transitioning into a new season is hard because it requires leaving behind what’s familiar and trusting God with what’s next. There’s tension between the old and the new, but we can choose to trust His leadership and say yes to the process.

When you step into a new season, you may feel unqualified or unsure. But God doesn’t call us based on who we were—He calls us based on who we’re becoming.

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching. 

33. Authentic Self vs. False Self: The Key to Living an Abundant Life

In this episode, I explore what it means to connect with your authentic self—the true essence of who you are, beyond labels, roles, and external expectations. I dive into the psychological concept of the false self, a version of yourself you create to seek love, approval, or attachment from others, often at the expense of your true identity.

Drawing from Gabor Maté’s work on attachment and trauma, I discuss how the need for connection can sometimes make us abandon our real selves in favor of performing a version that fits in or is more accepted by others. I also touch on tools like the Enneagram, Myers-Briggs, and DISC that help us understand ourselves better, but we emphasize that being true to yourself is ultimately about inner honesty.

HIGHLIGHTS:

• The authentic self is who you are at your core, free from external influences.
• The false self is a mask we wear to gain attachment or approval.
• Childhood experiences and insecure attachment can lead us to reject our true identity.
• Being authentic involves aligning with your core values, boundaries, and needs.
• Questions for self-reflection to help uncover your authentic self.

Activation Questions:

• Where do I feel most like myself?
• Who can I be around where I feel permission to be my full self?
• When do I abandon my authentic self for others?
• What parts of myself have I rejected because they felt "too much" or "not enough"?

Choosing authenticity every time can lead to greater peace, self-acceptance, and personal growth. It’s a journey of peeling back the layers to reveal the true you.

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching.

32. Getting Vision for the New Year

I love the New Year! It's a time for fresh starts, but let's be real, most resolutions fizzle out by February. Why? Often, we lack clear direction. We focus on the 'what' (lose weight, get organized) without the 'why'." In this episode, I offer a fresh perspective on getting vision for your new year that goes beyond goals and intentions.

 

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:

• Why most New Year's resolutions fail.
• The importance of a God-given vision for your life.
• Identifying and overcoming barriers to seeing God's vision.
• Practical steps for running your race with purpose and perseverance.
• The importance of staying focused on Jesus throughout your journey.
• Encouragement to trust God's plan for your life.

I hope you find this episode encouraging and that you feel inspired to take on your new year with purpose and vision. See you in 2025!

 

HOW TO CONNECT WITH ME:

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching.

31. Life Coach, Therapist, or Psychologist? How to Choose the Right Support

In this episode, I’m diving into a content-heavy breakdown of the different types of professional help available: life coaching, therapy, psychology, and psychiatry. While I’m not an expert or medical professional, I want to equip you with the information to confidently determine which type of support might be best for you. Here’s what I cover:

 

• Life Coach: A life coach helps with personal growth, goal-setting, and moving forward when you feel stuck. They’re not medical professionals and typically don’t address deep emotional wounds but focus on helping you create momentum in your life.

 

• Therapist/Counselor: Therapists work with emotional pain, relationship issues, and past trauma. They’re trained to help you process the past and develop tools to manage present challenges.

 

• Psychologist: A psychologist specializes in diagnosing and treating mental health conditions like anxiety, depression, or behavioral issues. They provide evidence-based treatments but don’t prescribe medication.

 

• Psychiatrist: Psychiatrists are medical doctors who diagnose and treat more severe mental health conditions. They can prescribe medication and provide medical management for disorders like bipolar disorder or schizophrenia.

 

This episode is packed with information to help you navigate your options, so grab a notebook and get ready to discern what kind of help aligns with your needs and goals!

29. Rhythms for a Sustainable Life

In this episode, I’m breaking down the daily, weekly, and yearly rhythms I use to simplify life, reduce stress, and create space for the things that matter most. You’ll want to listen to the episodes to get some good ideas for how to do it yourself, but here’s how I structure my life to stay grounded, intentional, and aligned with my priorities:

 

Daily:

• Wake at 5:50 for quiet time, workouts, therapy work, or learning.
• Use peak energy for chores before kids wake up.
• Daily outings: park, museum, errands, or playdates.
• Prep snack boxes and dinner during naptime.
• Set out clothes the night before.
• Morning coffee, afternoon matcha/MudWtr.
  
  

Weekly:

• Sunday: meal planning, fridge clean-out, task lists.
• Monday: grocery shopping and laundry reset.
• Fixed playdates: Tuesday PM, Wednesday AM.
• Wednesday night: house chores or self-care.
• Thursday: errands, appointments, and date night 
• Saturday: family sabbath—no work.
• Sunday: church to prioritize family worship culture.
  
  

Quarterly & Yearly:

• Quarterly resets to realign.
• Yearly family trip and proactive planning with Donta to set priorities.

 

These rhythms aren’t perfect, neither am I, but they allow me to show up in a way that aligns with my values, supports my family, and keeps me from feeling overwhelmed. Let’s dive into how you can create rhythms that work for your life!