33. Authentic Self vs. False Self: The Key to Living an Abundant Life

In this episode, I explore what it means to connect with your authentic self—the true essence of who you are, beyond labels, roles, and external expectations. I dive into the psychological concept of the false self, a version of yourself you create to seek love, approval, or attachment from others, often at the expense of your true identity.

Drawing from Gabor Maté’s work on attachment and trauma, I discuss how the need for connection can sometimes make us abandon our real selves in favor of performing a version that fits in or is more accepted by others. I also touch on tools like the Enneagram, Myers-Briggs, and DISC that help us understand ourselves better, but we emphasize that being true to yourself is ultimately about inner honesty.

HIGHLIGHTS:

• The authentic self is who you are at your core, free from external influences.
• The false self is a mask we wear to gain attachment or approval.
• Childhood experiences and insecure attachment can lead us to reject our true identity.
• Being authentic involves aligning with your core values, boundaries, and needs.
• Questions for self-reflection to help uncover your authentic self.

Activation Questions:

• Where do I feel most like myself?
• Who can I be around where I feel permission to be my full self?
• When do I abandon my authentic self for others?
• What parts of myself have I rejected because they felt "too much" or "not enough"?

Choosing authenticity every time can lead to greater peace, self-acceptance, and personal growth. It’s a journey of peeling back the layers to reveal the true you.

Find me on social media @chantelleenelson for more engaging and practical content on how to show up to your life! And don't forget to visit comealivelifecoaching.com for more information on my offers and coaching.